maine

•November 4, 2009 • Leave a Comment

all i can say is what the fuck (pardon my french)?

it still boggles my mind that minority rights are put up for a vote in this country.  that is not constitutional.  if it is, i’d like to vote to strip rights away from lots of people who annoy me and piss me off.

look, i don’t give a toss that chrissy christian or connie conservative don’t like the gays.  but the fact of the matter is they don’t get to vote on my life just like i don’t get to vote on theirs.  and the thing is, after a recent skirmish on a message board over the gay marriage issue, i have discovered many of these people are operating under completely ignorant fallacies.  for example, i heard “i don’t approve of homosexuality because people are harming their rectums.”  yes.  i heard this.  i should have shot back that i don’t approve of childbirth because women can hurt their vaginas.

ultimately, it just astonishes me people get their panties in a twist over how two adults choose to solidify their love and commitment.  shouldn’t we get our collective panties in a twist over murder, rape, child abuse, the environment, war, genocide, health care, bigotry, cancer, aids, lack of funding for public schools and american idol (ok, i’m the only one who thinks idol is a canker sore on the lower lip of popular culture)?  love and commitment?  those are good things, people!  remember burt bacharach?  what the world needs now is love, sweet love.  it’s the only think that there’s just too little of.

maine did not express love last night.  nor did they when this was put on the ballot, which it never should have been.

there’s a great post on my inflammatory writ that explains this a little better than i can.

the lily’s revenge and the brother sister plays

•November 2, 2009 • Leave a Comment

over the last week i was privileged to see two long form theater events happening off and off-off broadway.  it was interesting to have just seen these and then read a giant discussion about why the neil simon revivals flopped so badly on broadway and what audiences expect for their money in the theater (a big star . . . and big for broadway usually means someone who had a sitcom about 10+ years ago.  let’s bring jackee to broadway…in mame!).  however, away from broadway are two new works that are bold, imaginative, ambitious, moving and need no former sitcom stars.

i had missed the brothers size at the public when it opened there in 2007.  after seeing tarell alvin mccraney’s followup wig out! at the vineyard, i felt sorry i had missed out on the earlier play.  i was happy to see the public bring it back along with two other plays that make up a trilogy.  the three plays loosely follow a group of related characters named after orishas of the yoruba religion (something i feel very close to since i maintain yoruba is the national religion of cuba where it is known as santeria).  mccraney doesn’t adhere to the relationships between the orishas that i am familiar with–his version of oshun isn’t ogun’s beloved, for example … and elegba and eleggua are two different characters.  the first part in the red and brown water felt like a retelling of lorca’s yerma with oya searching for some meaning inside her relationships and community after the death of her mother and her inability to bear a child.  the brothers size is about the relationship between ogun and ochoosi size, two very different brothers whose relationship is about to sever.  the final play marcus or the secret of sweet is about elegba’s gay son marcus and his prophetic dreams of katrina striking the bayou.  mccraney plays with camp, mythology, brechtian alienation effects (the characters often announce their stage directions before performing them), dance and singing.  the borrowed elements sometimes felt overwhelming and somethings surprising–ogun and ochoosi’s lovely duet on “try a little tenderness” was a great example and a lot of the slapstick teethkissing shenanigans in marcus resulted in some wonderfully kinetic fireworks between the actors that would suddenly shift to poignancy with little effort.  i found in the red and brown water a bit more challenging as oya’s story felt a little private to me, but the final moment was incredibly powerful.  in a sense, oya gives birth to the succession of severed relations that follow: between ogun and ochoosi; between ochoosi and elegba; between elegba and marcus; between marcus and oba . . . these characters are constantly searching for a mirror, an affirmation of self within another person.  they are haunted by dreams that often remain puzzles to them.  in marcus, the eymology of the euphemism “sweet” (for “gay”) is explained.  during the slave trade, if two male slaves were found having sex, they were whipped and sugar was poured in their wounds, which would get sticky in the heat and attract flies.  these characters have all been lacerated by their desires and their wounds prevented from closing.  yet, as marcus discovers his “sweet” is also his sight . . . and it may not provide him with answers for himself, but he creates connections for others–particularly for ogun.

the lily’s revenge is an experience i am not sure i can be incredibly articulate about as i am still reeling from it.  it is a five hour event.  on one hand it is the story of a lily who strives to become a man and marry the bride and defeat the great longing, deity of nostalgia.  on the other hand it is about how we experience performance–the play is enormous, there are rules and structured activities and audience participation during the shows and intermissions, each act takes place in a reconfigured playing space and utilizes a combination of playing styles (comedy, verse, dance theater, video and a slapstick chaos that ends the evening).  for me it was impossible not to find myself interfacing with the material in very personal ways.  as i mentioned two posts down, i read these emily dickenson poems in an offstage area called “the context corner” where taylor shares his source materials.  i opened this book at random at each intermission and the next act had everything to do with the poem i had just read.  i responded to the struggle between nostalgia and being in the here and now.  the lily’s desire to be a man and defeat the great longing seemed to be at odds with each other and along the way he gains wisdom but loses his glittery lily self.  i was very moved by the small video where a white rose longs to be “the perfect specimen” and is deformed as a result.  i wondered about the great longing’s 2nd curtain being made up of the red napkins audience members were asked to write down things they longed for . . . it seemed to me longing was a trap that divorced one from real experience and joy and beauty.  the bride and groom’s longing for a perfect wedding had nothing to do with love and everything to do with their asserting their desire to live up to some proscribed gender role they felt they needed to live up to (and there was a meta narrative running parallel to this about traditional theater models being the death of the medium itself).   by the end i was an emotional, teary, sweaty and giddy mess.  all i wanted to was make art and make out.

i am not doing these two works justice in this blog post.  i suspect these will be works that i will have to think about for a long time and probably continue to learn about them as i speak to others who’ve seen them, read the reviews, read the texts (when published).  these plays made me think about what it means to be a creative person and what it means to be a part of this world with creativity.  sometimes when i long to be “the perfect specimen,” i feel i am longing for something that doesn’t exist and i am not seeing, really seeing what is inside of me and around me.  both tarell mccraney and taylor mac have presented a vision of the world that is their own–idiosyncratic, contradictory, paradoxical, magical, poetic and incredibly generous.  i felt they reached out to me and every audience member in the room and created a sense of community.

which is ultimately why we go to the theater right?  oh, and the hope that someone somewhere does cast jackee in mame.

 

new title?

•November 2, 2009 • Leave a Comment

thinking about the new play this weekend it occurred to me to name the evening the golden vanity (william bell/four last songs).  revisited some strauss to slowly get back into what is now called four last songs.  there are more secrets in the strauss, the music adrian hears in his head music that makes no sounds for me just yet.  four men who remain a mystery to me.  they aren’t giving themselves up too easily.  baxter’s voice is becoming clearer to me.  zed told me i had misunderstood him.  theo is too afraid to reveal the chink in his armor.  and adrian scares me (and i am sure he is scared of himself).

plays are such strange things.

the way an intimacy is developed between me and this entity, this file on my computer, that is a very real thing to me.  a play is an abstract force that allows itself to be seen and felt a short while in a certain form.  sometimes that force will choose various writers and various plays to be seen.  sometimes it’s seen once and never again.  sometimes it changes its mind and obscures itself again.

this particular one is sly.  no trickery here.  it won’t stand for it.  no bag of tricks.

emily dickenson poem read randomly in the context corner at the lily’s revenge

•November 2, 2009 • Leave a Comment

to make a prairie it takes a clover and one bee,—
one clover, and a bee,
and revery.
the revery alone will do
if bees are few.

a powerful week at the theater.  taylor mac’s the lily’s revenge and terell alvin mccraney’s the brother sister plays. i don’t know how to wrap my head around these plays.  the themes of longing that ran through both these giant and ambitious creations spoke to me with intimate telepathy.

more later.

nellie mckay

•October 28, 2009 • Leave a Comment

get her doris day tribute album now!  i just found out about this and it’s just delicious.  the arrangements are just smart, smart, smart (on a par with her genius obligatory visitors album).  i can think of a few people who have tried to do this sort of sound or album who can take lessons from nellie.

and look how cute she is!

free will astrology: aquarius

•October 28, 2009 • Leave a Comment

thank you, rob brezny

when i did a performance in santa fe a few years ago, a woman in the audience came up to me after the show and made a sardonic proposal: would i like to join her twelve-step program for writers who are overly fond of vivid adjectives and adverbs? with all the uppity mock politeness i could summon, i told her that i was preposterously happy with my scintillating addiction to brazen language, and didn’t regard it as a raggedy problem that needed invasive correcting. now i’m advising you to be like me and follow your heart when it tells you to be bigger, bolder, and brasher than ever before. right now, shiny intensity is your sacred duty! halloween costume suggestion: the sun.

la caridad del cobre

•October 27, 2009 • Leave a Comment

let’s talk about my girl cachita for a bit, shall we?

patron saint of cuba, a statue of la cardidad was found floating off the coast of cuban mining town cobre (cobre means copper in spanish) and saved three men in a boat from a storm.  a basilica in her honor was erected in cobre and people from all over cuba visit her asking for miracles.  even fidel castro has done this (incidentally, castro never banned la caridad finding her more of a national cultural icon than a religious one).

cachita (as she is nicknamed) is also the catholic guise of the santeria orisha ochun.  she is sort of like a yoruba venus–the orisha of love and matrimony.  being a very venus identified person myself i’m a hopeless . . . albeit growing more cynical every day . . . romantic and a creative person), i have always felt a lot of affinity for ochun (though i am by no means an expert on santeria at all . . . if i were to become an initiate, i wouldn’t even know if she would be my orisha or not) . . . and she is a representation of cuba, of my family, of vision of home that became more acute and precious to me when i moved to new york.

she’s appeared in sebastian and marea, which are my big cuban plays.  she normally lives on my tiny altar on my desk at home, but i’ve moved her near a vase with yellow flowers and a small glass of rum and honey and a yellow candle.  marea has made me superstitious. that play has a dark and scary force attached to it.  in many ways i feel a bit numb about this workshop coming up because i am too afraid to engage with the play mentally for too long.  i believe plays achieve a life of their own.  sebastian, expat/inferno, marea, and the october crisis all seem to have this unmistakable something.  i often feel that i can’t quite believe they came out of me.  all demanded to be written and would not let me go until they were.    in the face of this force, i’m keeping cachita out in a prominent place in my apartment to watch over me and this play.

people offer milagros to her, which are small effigies representing what they need her intervention for.  in that spirit:

may you watch over this play and ensure it a safe and positive journey towards production.

la damnation de faust

•October 27, 2009 • Leave a Comment

i caught robert lepage’s celebrated la damnation de faust production at the met last night.  i’ve been turning it over in my head all day.  it was a production that often defied me to figure out.  there were moments of sheer beauty followed by moments that puzzled me.  one of the puzzling things is lepage presents the transition between scenes in a sort of surreal dreamlike way.  i found i was craving more of a strong narrative framework to involve me emotionally.  because berlioz doesn’t really link these tableaux, neither does lepage.

i did love the way there were these visual leitmotifs running through the production: men on wires falling down like fallen angels (lucifer?) or fallen men (faust).  women dancing in a wild frenzy at their balconies as if marguerite’s sexual passion for faust were about to set the stage on fire (and her aria later does via projection).  the dance in the 2nd act was wild.  at times i feared one of the dancers would slip and fall of the tall balcony she was dancing on.

the ending of the opera is quite sad.  and that it what is sticking with me.  faust’s sacrifice leads to his damnation.  it reminds me of that line “no good deed goes unpunished.”  all he wanted was a revived interest in life and what he got was damnation.  he compares himself to the soldiers marching off to war at the beginning saying he does not feel as they do . . . and then he does at the end.  he marches off to a rescue that undoes him.  the image of those fallen soldiers that lepage staged so hypnotically at the end of the first act seems to foreshadow faust’s tragic fate.

i thought ramon vargas sang sweetly as faust, but he felt a little reserved and chilly to me.  olga borodina had a large pleasant voice, but something didn’t quite click for me there.  her husband ildar abdrazakov was quite good as mephistopheles.  he had a rich voice and a fantastic stage presence.  he was very effective even all the way in family circle.

the moment tonight at the gotham film festival 7pm

•October 22, 2009 • Leave a Comment

packawallop’s film the moment will be screened tonight at the gotham film festival.  i’m not involved with this one at all except as a proud godfather to the project.  fellow pack-a-peeps adam szymkowicz, susan louise o’connor (my mallory) and scott ebersold (my half italian siamese twin) are involved and if you can, please check it out.

what to do with anger and frustration?

•October 22, 2009 • Leave a Comment

i’m currently having one of those moments where i feel very angry and frustrated that certain things in my career and my personal life have not panned out.

i know i am not the only creative person or single person to feel these things and i think i have finally reached a point where i have enough maturity to know throwing a big temper tantrum (ah, my lovely 20s!) will just be beyond ridiculous.

i won’t go into detail about this here (and i’m sure it’s easy to deduce exactly what’s frustrating me anyway) but as i did my morning pages in my journal, i felt the strong physical manifestations of all this anger . . . my stomach started getting upset, my jaw was clenched and tight.  i felt the writing was a whole lot of complaining and it felt so circular and counterproductive it gave me a headache.  i just didn’t know how to experience these feelings.  i didn’t know where to put them.

i’m not even sure how to use this energy creatively.  i think the silent concerto contained a lot of this anger and i’m sure the audience sensed it and was turned off by it.  i did work a little on the golden vanity this morning and played with zed, who is the zerbinetta of my play.  he’s beautiful and the older man in the play is parading him around like arm candy.  and i did discover there is a violent force within him (only i get all dark when encountering beautiful, flirty types like zerbinetta . . .  i’m much more of an ariadne, craving the sublime and feeling rejected).  i don’t know how it’ll manifest . . . but it has recalibrated the play and reminded me there is a hurricane brewing offstage.